Title: His Needs, Her Needs Pdf Building an Affair-Proof Marriage
Author: Willard F. Jr. Harley
Published Date: 2011-02-01
Page: 240
The Best Book on Marriage Is Better Than Ever!In this classic bestseller Willard F. Harley, Jr., identifies the ten most vital needs of men and women and shows husbands and wives how to satisfy those needs in their spouses. He provides guidance for becoming irresistible to your spouse and for loving more creatively and sensitively, thereby eliminating the problems that often lead to extramarital affairs. This revised and expanded edition has been updated throughout and includes new writing that highlights the special significance of intimate emotional needs in marriage.|Willard F. Harley, Jr., is a nationally acclaimed clinical psychologist, a marriage counselor, and the bestselling author of numerous books, including Five Steps to Romantic Love, Love Busters, and His Needs, Her Needs for Parents. His popular website, www.marriagebuilders.com, offers practical solutions to almost any marital problem. Dr. Harley and his wife, Joyce, host a daily radio call-in show, Marriage Builders. They live in White Bear Lake, Minnesota. What will it take to make your marriage sizzle?Time after time, His Needs, Her Needs has topped the charts as the best marriage book available. More than any other, this book helps husbands and wives give each other what they need most in marriage.The millions of couples who have read His Needs, Her Needs have learned to keep the romance alive, and they are recommending it to others. Join those who have seen spectacular changes in their marriages by following Dr. Harley's tried and proven counsel. You will discover that an outstanding marriage can be more than a dream--it can be your reality.What couples are saying about His Needs, Her Needs:"My new husband and I were having trouble adjusting to marriage. I read the book and immediately things began to improve.""It is the best book on marriage I have ever read.""I have recommended this book to every one of my friends. It should become a staple in every house.""I can't believe how peaceful and loving our marriage has become since reading this book. We went from being at the brink of divorce to experiencing the same love and excitement as when we first met."Millions have already discovered the power of this book. Isn't it time you did as well?
This revised and expanded edition has been updated throughout and includes new writing that highlights the special significance of intimate emotional needs in marriage.
Why is this book so popular We got through 4 chapters over a few weeks and then tossed it in the recycle bin. It reads like it was written in the 1950s.Granted there are some good discussion questions that led to some great conversations between my new husband and me, but it was just nearly intolerable to read.I peeked at later chapters and was outright offended by some things. (as a woman that I know nothing of my own sexuality and that I need to count calories and wear the makeup that my husband prefers. WOW)More about sex as a cure all and scenes of affairs This book was recommended by a friend. The first few chapters talk about sex, and how it is a “cure all” so to speak. It gives explicit details about how things work which I felt was very unnecessary and not a good fit for this book. It was very unexpected. The next few chapters are scenarios which are typical ways that people meet each other in life (conversation and excitement) These things don’t have to lead to an affair and won’t if your marriage is healthy. The author suggests that couples basically make things work no matter what by constantly fulfilling the needs of your spouse with no suggestions for fulfilling your own needs such as taking time to yourself etc. The book totally involves fulfilling your spouses needs at all times with zero privacy or time alone. Your partner’s personality and decisions on how to treat you are not something that you can change to make yourself happy. (In other words, you work hard d to fulfill your spouses needs while your own are unmet. How long do you keep going on like that?) The author states that the same problems will arise in the next relationship as well, which I do not believe as the next relationship will not involve the exact same people or personalities. The author calls any affair -friendship -acquaintance just a fantasy and declares they will never work long term. Books don’t know people or feelings and cannot decide if a relationship will work or not. He also ends the book with the fact that people in affairs may honestly love each other. Really????Fantasies are not real but love is so to me that is contradictory. The book is supposed to be about affair proofing your marriage not deciding if you truly love your spouse enough to meet all their daily needs. Affairs are hurtful and wrong. Divorces are difficult, but Life is short, you live once, be yourself, and be happy. I do not suggest this as a book to keep from having an affair, but it MAY better a rocky marriage if both people work to fulfill the needs of their spouse. It is more for someone who has already been a part of an affair.More like: His needs, his needs I hated this book! It was sexist and degrading. Written by the point of view of a narcissistic man who only had his “needs” in mind. As a woman you should always be ready for sex, or he’ll cheat. always look good, never gain weight, get plastic surgery if your not pretty enoughor he’ll cheat, take care of the kids before he gets home and make sure that they are behaving and looking like perfect little angels while he’s home (because heaven forbid he knows that being a parent is stressful because if you stress him out he’ll cheat. Have a 5 Star dinner ready when he gets home, make sure to bring him sime slippers and a cold beverage so he can watch tv or take a nap while you make sure that the children are not disturbing him, or he’ll cheat. Make sure that you are super interested in all of his hobbies and devote your life to being his perfect companion, or he’ll cheat. Never trouble him with things that trouble you, or he’ll cheat. Wear sexy underwear to bed because if he sees you in unflattering comfortable pajamas he’ll cheat. Make sure you fulfill his every sexual desire, or he’ll cheat. Etc....her needs: bring home a paycheck, who cares if you get fat women don’t care about looks as long as you occasionally shower and brush your teeth! Listen to her (or at least pretend to listen) and give her lots of affection i.e. pat her on the head and tell her what a good girl she is and occasionally throw her a $20 and tell her to buy herself something pretty. Also if you don’t meet ALL of her needs she’ll cheat.Most importantly if your spouse cheats on you it 100% YOUR fault!
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